 |


 |
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
 |
June 11, 2008
I has almost been a year and a half since we first started dating; our anniversary landing on the 25th of each month. We started dating on Christmas day since I drove to your house to meet your family. My mother was having a fit about me driving on the expressway in the snow. We determined then that 5 years between us was still acceptable according to the old man rule (age/2 +7.) You were 26 and I was 21. We met through our friends Maria and Stephanie and I was mesmerized by your skills on the Pump it Up machine. There was one time in Maria's dorm I will never forget, where you caressed my face really romantic and slow... and then had to run out of of the room to fart. It was incredibly loud and it echoed. We could smell it all the way back inside. Ha ha ha! >_> that was almost a deal breaker .. i was like WTF?!! no
Our first date was a trip to the Art Institute in Downtown Chicago. You were kind enough to drive me there in order to finish a project that I had for Art History Class. I remember holding your hand for the first time as we crossed the street to eat at the Bennigans. We sat at a 2 person table where I continued to hold your hand and have butterflies in my stomach. You tried to kiss me all day but I didn't let you and I wasn't going to let you until at the very last second I ran back to the car after you dropped me off. I think I nearly head-butted you, but you said it was hot.
You have been an exceptional boyfriend: patient, generous, fun, and caring. You drive me everywhere, you enjoy my company and we get along so well. You also spoil me rotten; which of course, I like very much. For my birthday you bought me a very sparkly gold and white sapphire necklace and for Christmas you bought two tickets for us to see the Blue Man Group. For Valentines Day you surprised me at work with a package. When I signed for it and opened it, there was a teddy-bear inside holding a heart shaped jewelry box which contained an even sparkler blue sapphire necklace. It was the most romantic thing anyone has done for me. To top everything off, for my graduation, in the spur of the moment, you bought me an Imac computer. I will never forget the “deer in headlights” feeling I had that day.
On this particular day, June 11th, 2008, I received a call from you. You told me that your doctor found a lump in your throat and cut it out in order to do a biopsy on it. I wanted to see you right away. I was afraid of what would happen. I wouldn't know what to do without you. We took these pictures on my Imac before leaving for Olive Garden. You were in an incredible amount of pain. On Monday the 16th your test came back benign and I was very relieved.
~ this is the excerpt that i typed up about me and Shane for my scrapbook...
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
 |







 |
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
, you're now logged in! Below you'll find your test result. After, continue on to your homescreen to discover what we're about.
Starving Artist
You are 14% Rational, 28% Extroverted, 42% Brutal, and 57% Arrogant. |
You are the Starving Artist! Like some sort of emaciated Frenchman, you sit in your fancy little chair and contemplate beauty, meaning, flowers, and all kinds of other ridiculous crap. You are more intuitive than logical, and are primarily guided by your heart and emotions. You are also very introverted and gentle. Of course, this does not mean that you do not have an ego. In fact, you are surprisingly arrogant for someone so emotional and gentle. This is why you are best described as a starving artist. You are very introspective and quite sure of yourself, as any accomplished artist is, yet your views are impractical, guided by feelings, and overly gentle. You probably find math, logic, and similar intellectual pursuits offensive to your artistic sensibilities, and you prefer the open-endedness of artistry because it's infinitely easier to ponder the beauty of a sock than to build rocketships. So really you have no reason to be arrogant, you big doofus, because the skills you value (emotion, spirit, art, etc.) in yourself are valuable only on a subjective level, meaning your arrogance is purely masturbatory, like the insipid self-pleasuring of some twat who spouts artistic nonsense only for the pleasant tinkling sound it makes upon his indiscriminating ears. In short, your personality is defective because you are arrogant, introverted, introspective, gentle, and thoroughly irrational...posessing most of the traits needed to be a starving--and useless--artist. So get out there, write a few short stories that are allegories for the indestructible spirit of socks, and starve!
To put it less negatively:
1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.
2. You are more INTROVERTED than extroverted.
3. You are more GENTLE than brutal.
4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.
Compatibility:
Your exact opposite is the Capitalist Pig.
Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Haughty Intellectual, the Televangelist, and the Emo Kid.
*
*
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.
The other personality types:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
Be sure to take my Sublime Philosophical Crap Test if you are interested in taking a slightly more intellectual test that has just as many insane ramblings as this one does!
The following image was made by Stephan Brusche at http://www.sb77.nl, a real-life "starving artist". Check out his website if interested.
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
 |

 |
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
 |
Your Type is ESFJ | Extroverted | Sensing | Feeling | Judging | | Strength of the preferences % | | 1 | 12 | 62 | 33 | Qualitative analysis of your type formula You are: - slightly expressed extrovert
- slightly expressed sensing personality
- distinctively expressed feeling personality
- moderately expressed judging personality
What makes an ESFJ tick? The Dominant function is the judging one of Feeling. Characteristics associated with this function include: - Makes decisions on the basis of personal values
- Is appreciative and accepting of people - enjoying company and seeking harmony
- Assesses the impact of decisions on others, being sympathetic or compassionate
- Takes a personal approach
The judging Feeling function is extraverted. That is, Feeling is used primarily to govern the outer world of actions and spoken words. The ESFJ will therefore: - seek stable, harmonious relationships
- tend to adapt to the environment, taking on board those values that are held as important by friends and family, or society as a whole
- express the appreciation that is felt towards others
- tend to consider others' feelings before his/her own
- be sensitive to praise and criticism, and seek to conform to others' reasonable expectations
The Feeling function is primarily supported by introverted Sensing perception, That is, Sensing perception is used primarily to manage the inner world of thoughts and emotions. This will modify the way that the Feeling is directed, by: - focusing the (outer world) Feeling on current relationships and people, e.g.: through social events and fact-based conversation
- finding practical ways to be of service to people
- viewing people subjectively, observing facts that support harmonious relationships
The classic temperament of an ESFJ is Epimethean, or Melancholic, for whom a basic driving force is duty, service and the desire to belong. Contributions to the team of an ESFJ In a team environment, the ESFJ can contribute by: - working hard and efficiently to complete tasks by the deadlines set
- ensuring that everyone in the team feels valued, and that their needs are met
- maintaining good relationships, and building team spirit, often through enthusiastic organisation of social activities
- keeping the team informed, asking for contributions from all members, and seeking to arrive at consensus decisions
- maintaining respect for established hierarchies and traditions
- striving to ensure that people are happy with the service provided
The potential ways in which an ESFJ can irritate others include: - talking too much
- assuming they know the needs of others
- avoiding conflict, and not giving criticism when it is needed
- not paying attention to their own needs
- not seeing the wood for the trees
- being reluctant to try out new things or work towards new possibilities
Personal Growth As with all types, the ESFJ can achieve personal growth by developing all functions that are not fully developed, through actions such as: - learning to observe and accept the negative aspects of those people they admire
- trying to view people in a more independent and objective way
- pausing and thinking, encouraging others to articulate their own needs, and using active listening to verify understanding
- undertaking a critical appraisal of a situation or person, and expressing disagreement or criticism when it could be of value to the recipient
- establishing a list of the ESFJ's personal needs, and ensuring they are met - recognising that there are ways in which the ESFJ and others can have both sets of needs met
- establishing a long term goal, working towards it, but being prepared to modify it in the light of experience and developing circumstances
- listing options and undertaking a formal process of evaluation against criteria, including a cost benefit analysis
Recognising Stress As stress increases, 'learned behaviour' tends to give way to the natural style, so the ESFJ will behave more according to type when under greater stress. For example, in a crisis, the ESFJ might: - work hard to complete pre-defined tasks
- express appreciation for everyone else's efforts
- fail to recognise the need for change
- neglect their own needs whilst being concerned for others
Under extreme stress, fatigue or illness, the ESFJ's shadow may appear - a negative form of INTP. Example characteristics are: - being very critical and finding fault with almost everything
- having a pessimistic view of the future
- suggesting ideas that are quite impractical
- ignoring others' feelings
The shadow is part of the unconscious that is often visible to others, onto whom the shadow is projected. The ESFJ may therefore readily see these faults in others without recognising it in him/her self Provider Guardians take it upon themselves to arrange for the health and welfare of those in their care, but they are also the most sociable of all the Guardians, and thus are the great nurturers of established institutions such as schools, businesses, churches, social clubs, and civic groups. Wherever they go, Providers take up the role of social contributor, happily giving their time and energy to make sure that the needs of others are met, that traditions are supported and developed, and that social functions are a success. Providers are very likely more than ten percent of the population, and this is very fortunate for the rest of us, because friendly social service is a key to their nature. Highly cooperative themselves, Providers are skilled in maintaining teamwork among their helpers, and are also tireless in their attention to the details of furnishing goods and services. They make excellent chairpersons in charge of social events. They are without peer as masters of ceremonies, able to approach others with ease and confidence, and seemingly aware of what everyone's been doing. And they are outstanding hosts or hostesses, able to remember people's names, usually after one introduction, and always concerned about the needs of their guests, wanting to insure that all are involved and provided for. Providers are extremely sensitive to the feelings of others, which makes them perhaps the most sympathetic of all the types, but which also leaves them rather self-conscious, that is, highly sensitive to what others think of them. Because of this Providers can be crushed by personal criticism, and will work most effectively when given ample appreciation both for themselves personally and for the service they give to others. This is not to say that Providers are afraid to express their own emotional reactions. They are quick to like and dislike-and don't mind saying so-tending to put on a pedestal whatever or whoever they admire, and to come down hard on those people and issues they don't care for. In their choice of careers, Providers may lean toward sales and service occupations. They have such pleasant, outgoing personalities that they are far and away the best sales reps, not only regularly winning sales contests, but earning seniority in any sales group within an organization. Observing Providers at work in a sales transaction reveals clearly how this type personalizes the sale. They are visibly-and honestly-concerned with their customer's welfare, and thus the customer is not simply buying the product, but is buying personally from the Provider. This same characteristic causes them to be good in many people-to-people jobs, as teachers, clergy, coaches, social workers, office receptionists, and so on. Providers seldom become a source of irritation in the workplace; on the contrary, they are unflagging in their devotion to their company, and show such personal loyalty to their immediate superiors that they make invaluable personal secretaries. Guardians of birthdays, holidays and celebrations, ESFJs are generous entertainers. They enjoy and joyfully observe traditions and are liberal in giving, especially where custom prescribes. All else being equal, ESFJs enjoy being in charge. They see problems clearly and delegate easily, work hard and play with zest. ESFJs, as do most SJs, bear strong allegiance to rights of seniority. They willingly provide service (which embodies life's meaning) and expect the same from others. ESFJs are easily wounded. And when wounded, their emotions will not be contained. They by nature "wear their hearts on their sleeves," often exuding warmth and bonhomie, but not infrequently boiling over with the vexation of their souls. Some ESFJs channel these vibrant emotions into moving dramatic performances on stage and screen. Strong, contradictory forces consume the ESFJ. Their sense of right and wrong wrestles with an overwhelming rescuing, 'mothering' drive. This sometimes results in swift, immediate action taken upon a transgressor, followed by stern reprimand; ultimately, however, the prodigal is wrested from the gallows of their folly, just as the noose tightens and all hope is lost, by the very executioner! An ESFJ at odds with self is a remarkable sight. When a decision must be made, especially one involving the risk of conflict (abhorrent to ESFJs), there ensues an in-house wrestling match between the aforementioned black-and-white Values and the Nemesis of Discord. The contender pits self against self, once firmly deciding with the Right, then switching to Prudence to forestall hostilities, countered by unswerving Values, ad exhaustium, winner take all. As caretakers, ESFJs sense danger all around--germs within, the elements without, unscrupulous malefactors, insidious character flaws. The world is a dangerous place, not to be trusted. Not that the ESFJ is paranoid; 'hyper-vigilant' would be more precise. And thus they serve excellently as protectors, outstanding in fields such as medical care and elementary education. Functional Analysis: Extraverted Feeling ESFJs live in their Extraverted Feeling functioning. Feeling, a rational (i.e., deciding) function, expresses opinions easily in the E world of objects and people. ESFJs have the ability to express warmth, rage, and a range of other emotions. Actions are encouraged or rebuked based on how they affect other people, especially people near and dear to the ESFJ. This type's vocal decisiveness predisposes many of its number to facility with administration and supervision. Introverted Sensing The secondary Sensing function aids and abets the dominant Fe in that sensate data is collected and at once compared with the inner forms or standards. Data on which decisions are made are thus focused and given a contrast which tends to be stronger and clearer than the original stimuli. The strengthening effect of Si on Fe may be responsible for this type's reputation for wearing their "hearts on their sleeves." At any rate, ESFJs reflect the "black and white" view of reality which is common to the SJ types. Extraverted iNtuition Intuition is tertiary--as the ESFJ matures, and as situations arise which call for suspension of criticism, Ne is allowed to play. Under the leadership of the Fe function, iNtuition allows for a loosening of the more rigid Si rights and wrongs; teasing and slapstick humor emerge. ESFJs are also capable of discerning patterns and philosophies, but such perceiving is subject to the weakness of the tertiary position, and the results often lack the variety and complexity of connections that more complex systems require. Introverted Thinking The inferior Ti function may rarely be expressed. In fact, ESFJs may take affront at the aloof, detached nature of dominant Ti types, or conversely, be drawn to them. Some ESFJs construct rationale which have the appearance of (Jungian) Thinking logic, but under scrutiny are in fact command performances of "Thinking in the service of Feeling," (i.e., Thinking-like conclusions which do not obey the tenets of impersonal logic; they rather construct scenarios from only those "hard, cold facts" which support the conclusion reached by the dominant Extraverted Feeling function. To wit: You don't sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with knitting needles. -- Miss Piggy, on eating Chinese Food Famous ESFJs: - U.S. Presidents:
- William McKinley
- William J. Clinton
Jack Benny Desi Arnaz ("Ricky Ricardo") Don Knotts ("Barney Fife") John Connally (former Governor of Texas) Terry Bradshaw, NFL quarterback Sally Struthers (All in the Family) Mary Tyler Moore Dixie Carter (Designing Women) Steve Spurrier, Heismann trophy winner, Univ. of Fla. football coach Sally Field Danny Glover, actor (Lethal Weapon movies, Predator 2 Margaret Butt Nancy Kerrigan (U.S. olympic figureskater) Elvis Stojko (Canadian olympic figureskater) Fictional ESFJs: Babbitt (Sinclair Lewis) Hoss Cartwright (Bonanza) Leonard "Bones" McCoy (Star Trek) Monica (Friends) Haleh (ER) Donald Duck Rabbit, Winnie the Pooh
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
 |

 |
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
 |
so i thought that i would paste some older entrys :D yay! Thursday, December 21, 2006i remembered what i wanted for christmas that was a book.... how to draw manga books! all except the 1st issue :D So i am quite dissapointed at how little Christmas spirit i am feeling this season. It seems to me that more and more i find that i am unexcited until Christmas Eve and don't feel the same magic i did as a kid. Most likely because of the Santa factor, but still. I really really really would like to go see the Nativity story in theatres soon. It looks like just what i need to get into the spirit. I have been on Gaia like constantly since we have been on break and i have accumulated a lot of christmas type items and participated in the caroling and hoped it would bring me some happyness concidering that the event was about giving presents however in the end i felt like a greedy whore who just wanted a lot of free items and to look better than everyone. I think that the only thing that will make me feel good is giving people presents. Because giving is much better than recieving after all. However all the moneys that i have seemed to accumulate over the semester is dissapearing with my car insurance payments and gift giving and book buying :/ and it is makig me poor and sad. I decorated my christmas tree yesterday with my sister and it just wasn't the same. She wan't talking to me or anything it was wierd and it made me sad. However this morning i picked her up from school and then we went home and watched nick Jr. together and laughed at the new Dora the Explorer. One good thing did happen however, I got my report card and i had straight A's with 6 classes i was very suprised because my Ethics final was so hard! I had to write 19 pages in one day! ~_~ but i think that most of my A's are out of luck. My marketing "A" was because Mr. Bergman noticed I had boobs and that I put forth any kind of effort. My "A" in Art History is because I am a good bull shitter when it comes to things i know a lot about. And art is one of those things i know a lot about ~_~ My "A" in my other art classes were givins because art is graded by effort and i have to put in a lot to have enough for my portfolio. Finally my ethics "A" was because i sat in the front row and talked to the teacher who really couldn't speak that great of English and couldn't hear well. Also he could easily see that i was vigorusly taking notes each class >.< so yes luck. I've been thinking a lot lately with my extra time but i have been generally depressed and have been suffering a sore throat every once in a while which seems to be easily cured by orange juice. However my tonsils are extremely large and lumpy and swollen.My dentist noticed this and was alarmed. So, I went to the doctor to make sure i was okay but he yelled at me saying i had no symptoms, my tonsils looked normal and to never come back and get a different doctor :/ He also yelled at me for not going to the gyno and was like well of course you are having sex! and i was like actually doctor no i'm a virgin. And he was like heres a list of docs you have to go to now leave. So he didn't really answer my question at all about my tonsils and so i looked up online what it might be and it seems to me that a lot of young femals who have had mono get really large tonsils that linger for the rest of their life. and like 90% of people who have had mono need a tonsilectamy because they will have throat problems the rest of their life :/ so i think that is the correct answer. well this is the longest update i have done in a while. I think i'm going to stop now lol Sunday, December 10, 2006well i think i might have found myself another job. I was at my cousin davids 1st birthday today and there was a face painter there and i casually asked her if she was hiring. she was very excited when i told her my expierence and said she always needs help. i'm probably over qualifyed. i could teach this lady a thing or two. i'm emailing her my mock up resume. i'll see what happens :P its 35$ an hour about as much as mrs. shutts would pay me when i was with her... actually a bit more ...plus we get to put out a tip jar ^.^ i'm kinda excited. she does princess parties so i have to dress up XD how cute!
Thursday, December 07, 2006
well i still feel like shit if not shitter shit. The lowest of the low. The worst person on the face of the earth. I try to be compasisonate but it doesn't help and there is nothing i can do about it. But my cousin david's 1st birthday is commin up and i have to go see him. and then the day after his party my family and i are going to see king tut. that sould be interesting. i have been staying up with stephanie every night watching her play kindom hearts two trying to bond with her and be close as sisters again becasue with me being so busy all the time i usually don't have time to spend with her. that is one of my goals ... to be a better sister. I also will be doing a lot of art over the break. I want to try drawing glass with colored pencils now... and possibly prismacolor markers. Mark Swain really has high expectations for the show that i am trying to prepare. Over the break i also wanted to finish my quilt that candice helped me with. I was going to hang that up in my senior show but Swain said that the show would be stronger if it was ALL glass. x_x and then i mentioned that over summer i was planning on taking a ceramics class at moraine, but Swain said that those pieces would not match and also weaken my show ... anyone can throw a pot ... he says, but painting takes more skill and he thinks that my portfolio would be stronger if i just came over the summer and painted. so i might possibily do that. Swain was also telling me that he thinks i should go to grad school for painting. I think he feels like i'm his daughter. He wants me to be just like him it seems. He always says we are similar ~_~ Friday, November 24, 2006 mmmmm thanksgiving was tasty. Even though i had to begin cleaning like two days in advance, I think that the Holiday went well. My grandpa, cousins, aunt, uncle and great uncle came over. Neal made apple pie banana bread, jello, and cranberry diping sause for our turkey. I remembered that i was a stuffing-a-holic. But this year my mom had to separate the stuffing between the stuffing that was cooked inside the turkey and the stuffing that was cooked outside of the turkey because apparently, my cousin neal has been totally obsessed with watching the food channel and learned that its not good to stuff your turkey anymore! The stuffing cooks in the "danger zone" of the turkey which doesn't get as much heat as the reast of the meat and casues an ideal breeding ground for bactera. ::clears throat:: well in my personal oppinion, those bacteria taste very good and i love them O_O <3 yay bacteria! Then we actually talked to one another and found out that we both like dragon force lololol. Eric is transfering to a different college :( and then we started an interesting convo at the dinner table. Stephanie brought up how when we all get older she does NOT want to EVER host any holidays at her house and shes going to be anti social. Then Eric was like yeah all of our family parties are going to be boring becasue hes not going to have any kids. and then steph goes well i'm not having any kids either and then everyone looked at me -_- and i was like ... well i'll have 2 tops... so yeah it will be boring. Neal just sat silently. I think he wants to have kids unless he turns out to be gay or something but i don't think so XD. And then they proceded to say how I will have to bring the family together becasue I just seem like the one who is the most nurturing and cares the most about family. -_- ::sigh:: why meee. i REALLY want a ne w computer chair i'm so uncomfortable in my moms desk chair from when we was 2 years old. Chnadu got me reading this graphic novel called Bone. Its really good and very LOTR like. i am hungry so i'll update more later! time to listen to some guster and snow patrol and to write my final paper for marketing. Happy st. nicks day one day late too Current Mood: sick
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
 |

|
 |
|
 |